Hardbody? Ha!

I am not a hardbody by any stretch of the imagination.

I mean, here in the world of Pornucopia, the existence is based on the assumption and presumption of a fantasy.

The events that take place before me are not real. That much is known and true.

And so while I do think that there are lots of guys that would love to be a porn star, I like to think that most of us don't have the skills to be able to handle that kind of pressure.

I've never tried for the simple reason that I'm not in shape.

Actually, I guess I need to clarify. I am in shape, if you consider round to be a shape.

In all seriousness, though, I look at porn like I look at sports: I am a fan on some level because I physically cannot do it.

Or at least, I could do it. But I don't have the physical skills to be the best of the best.

So I watch from the stands and enjoy myself.